Tiny Tim

I tried to calm my Fiat Punto down, but after an artic lorry cut him up on the way to Blackburn, he flipped. He was sounding his horn and flashing his lights; it was carnage. He was so infuriated that I was forced to take an alternative route to work for fear that my car would drive itself off a cliff.

The scenic route offered serenity in the bucket load. A Lancashire sun was rising over the village illuminating the freshly laid road ahead. I even whispered a prayer of thanks for the day. (I repented on my Punto’s behalf and meandered slowly through the outskirts of the town.)

As my wheels glided innocently passed a local primary school, Tiny Tim, a class later-comer, was approaching the pavement about ten metres in front of me. Though he was only 3ft tall and had been on Earth for around seven years, he knew I wouldn’t be able to stop in time for him. And so he stood, upright off the road like a good boy.

But nooooooooooooooo a lollypop man has other ideas. A rush of blood to his brainless head causes him to step right out in front of my 27mph moving vehicle and he held his fluorescent sign out like Gandalph’s wand…”YOU SHALL NOT PASS!”

Emergency stop. The Adrenaline, terrorising my previously calm mind, kicked in and I pulled off the most monumental braking maneuverer this side of the equator. I didn’t even think about what I did next. Before I knew it I was parking my now livid Punto next to larry lollypop and vacating my vehicle. I walked up to the man, who may as well have had horns, a white hood and a tattoo which said I hate Alex Willmott, and I asked him one simple question. “Are you aware how stupid that was?”

He looked me square in the eye with an annoying sense of peace. I then felt a tugging on my suit blazer just to the left of me. I honestly thought I was having a heart attack due to the fury which was now setting up camp in my soul. I looked down expecting to see my arteries running away from me, but there was Tiny Tim, standing like a toy soldier.

He smiled. I frowned. He smiled more. I couldn’t frown more or I would have strained my face. He spoke: “Sorry Mr, I crossed without looking. My fault.”

The scene replayed in my mind and looking back, the lollipop man might just have saved this kid’s life. I glanced back at the man who smiled sheepishly at the lad and told him to get to class. I returned back my car and took a long hard look at myself.

We are usually angry before we set off. And that’s a problem. I am angry because I think I deserve more than what life gives me on certain days.